Crazy, Busy Life

We have been on a whirlwind for a few weeks. So much so of a whirlwind that a lot of people don't know what we've been up to. We even haven't had much time to think about it!

We can give the long story individually because right now I'm trying to type and watch our toddler "hide" things in drawers at our current place of residing. I'm not calling it a residence because we're not really living here, we're just residing here for awhile.

We spent last week in Monument, CO at Greater Europe Mission's office learnin about GEM and thankfully being appointed to work at Black Forest Academy in Kandern, Germany this fall. Since that happened, now we're in little, tiny, middle of nowhere Houghton College in Houghton, NY learning about Third Culture Kids and how to work with them. We're going to spend this next school year at BFA being dorm parents. We're excited about the change of pace. We can really see now why life was like it was these past 6 months or so. I remember asking God many times WHY???? and now I see why.

We're looking forward to growing as a family in many different ways. Being away from extended family will be hard, but we think that it'll make our little family unit stronger and closer.

While at GEM training we met some amazing people that we hope to see again soon. Our orientation class is making it a goal to be the first group to all make it to international convention 2010. It's never happened before, but I have a good feeling about our class!

I don't have any pics from this week yet, but here are some from CO.

My Baby Turned 2 Yesterday!

My little guy turned two yesterday. I can't believe that just two short years ago he came into our lives (yes, I know there were 40 weeks before that where he was "in" our life, but you know what I mean). I have a hard time remembering life before he came around.
He is very much a toddler these days. He likes to choose what shirt he wears and tries to stall bed time by saying he's hungry. He can do the motions to a few songs and likes to listen to them over and over again. He's got quite a sense of humor and knows what is funny. He can give puppy and lion kisses. He can say sentences like "There's mommy's car!" which we understand! But he also says things like "I want the sunbutter on my crackers" which we don't understand and only figure out by asking questions until he nods with a nod that says "uh, yeah, what took you so long to understand me?" Then he says lots of words which I will bore you with but I want to document for my records until I write them down somewhere I won't loose them: Mommy, Daddy, crash (for truck), uh-oh, na-na (all done), nay-nay (Aunt Kaitlin), mak (for milk and Uncle Mark), Mimi, Opapa, Granny, Papa, Aunt Glocky (why he can't say Aunt for Kaitlin we have no idea), Nana (his friend Savannah), Anie (Lanie), bar (bear), zoom (plane), ball, cup, eat, more, please, dit-doo (thank you), tutle (turtle), paint, read, draw, car, where is?, what is that?, me, Knock (Knox), oo-ee (monkey), puppies, t.v., music, roll, chip, hot, cold, no, ooohhhhh, wow, side (slide), ice (outside), ish (shoe or fish), asi (raisin), ech (peach), ay-oh (play dough), up... and others. Quite a few are a bunch of nonsense letters strung together, but we understand what they mean because he's consistent in using them. He likes to flip the syllables around, but apparently that's not too weird and he should get past that. He signs some still as well. He's even made up a sign or two. Funny kid.
It's fun to see him learn more things every day. When he opened his birthday presents he was full of "wows" and "ooohhhhs." He loves to read books and will hand you one and say "read!" I think that comes from me reading to him from very, very early on. He's such an easy going kid which I think is going to be to all of our advantages! He still naps well and sleeps well. He hasn't tried to climb out of his crib which I'm very thankful for. Maybe by the end of the summer we'll put him in the toddler bed version of his crib, but for now I'm just going to let him be where he is since he's happy with it. No point changing what's not broken.
He also likes to cook. He insists on helping me cook and bake. He likes to pretend to cook as well. He has an oven and lots of pots and pans to play with. He knows to use a pot holder and to add seasonings. One of his friends got a kitchen for Christmas and he was so excited to play with it when we went over to her house. He was microwaving things, pressing the buttons, etc. It was so funny. He also loves balls. He can dribble a ball and throw one as well. He likes to mow the lawn with his lawn mower. He loves bubbles. He likes drawing (on anything...sigh) and painting. He likes using rubber stamps too. He loves playing with the water hose and trying to drink the bathwater. He wakes up every day saying "Mommy!?!" He likes to jump and play the piano. He love airplanes and his Cozy Coupe. He loves being outside.
He can take off his clothes now. That was a fun after nap time clean up about a week ago. I had no idea he could take off jeans and a long sleeve tee and his diaper. lol. It was sooooo funny.
He's a pretty neat kid and I love spending time with him. I know he's a good kid, but it's also comforting to hear from the people in the nursery that they love taking care of him because he is so easy going. He was over tired one day during MOPS and had a big melt down and the nursery workers called me and they were so confused. They had no idea what was wrong and you could tell they were worried. Turns out he was just really tired from all the fun and was hungry too and just lost it. That was the only time in 2 years I've had to get him. I'm so thankful for an easy kid, but it makes me a little fearful of having another one some day!
Okay that's enough bragging about my baby - for now at least.

Coupons - Still Not Convinced?!?

If you're still not convinced that you need help learning how to use coupons correctly...

Shopping trip this evening -

3 Bertolli spaghetti sauce pouches = $.33/each
3 McCormrick Grill mates = FREE
8 travel sized Band Aid pkgs (8 band aids in each) = FREE
2 Colgate toothbrushes = FREE
1 Vitamin water bottle = FREE
4 Angel Soft toilet paper 4 packs = FREE
2 Soft Soap 7.5oz = FREE

And yes I did buy some sunscreen ($1.oo off), Tree Top apple juice ($1.00 off 2) and sugar ($.90 off), etc. but as usual I spent the same amount that I saved and got some items I wouldn't usually buy like the spaghetti sauce pouches. Ragu is about $.06/oz at Kroger and Bertolli is a lot more, but in this case it would up being maybe about $.03/oz or less. I can't remember how many ounces are in each pouch. Either way, I'm hoping it tastes better than Ragu!

In other news I've got an artist on my hands. He drew on the walls a few days ago and all over his body and today he drew on himself, his clothing and his car. Sigh. Thankfully most of it washed up easily. I'm hoping the clothes come out unscathed this time. These markers weren't washable. He's so funny too. He tells me where he colored when I ask! lol.

90% Coupon Savings!

I did a talk on Tuesday to my MOPS group about using coupons and sales and saving lots on your groceries. I'm hoping some of those people are serious that they'd hire me to actually sit down with them and teach them my techniques. If you're interested, here's what I bought and spent and if you think that's spiffy, you can hire me too! Have a coupon party with me; I'll even teach you how to make a coupon binder which is so much easier to use than any other method.

On Wednesday at Kroger I bought:

1 pkg Juicy Fruit gum
3 Pillsbury brownie mixes
1 bag Kroger tortilla chips
1 bag organic baby carrots
4 bags Quaker Quakes rice cakes
2 bags Birds Eye frozen veggies
2 bottles Suave conditioner
2 bottles Suave shampoo
2 Suave deodorants

Final purchase price: $2.88

I was super excited when I got the ad that morning in the mail because I knew it was going to be a great shopping trip. I actually went back the following day and bought a few more brownie mixes, deodorants and shampoos to put in a box for the food pantry. I've decided that this is a way that I can contribute to those who can't even afford good food without breaking my limited grocery budget. I think on that second trip I only spent about $1 to buy 6 items to donate. And everything was a name brand.
If you already have couponing somewhat down, I can help you to figure out how to stock your cupboard so you can "shop" for dinner from it as well as figure out how to make meals from the sales circulars that actually taste good.

Monkey in the Rain

It rained a lot last night between 11pm and 12am. Not as much as our friends a bit further south in the metroplex, but enough. So while it rained I was talking to my mom about how my grandmother was doing. Then I talked to D about it. Got tired. Its after 12am by now. Say, "I'm going to feed Monkey and then go to bed." Get up off the floor where I was sitting, walk into the kitchen and then, and only then, do I realize that Monkey had been outside the whole time. Oops. I yelled (quietly) "Monkey is outside!" And then we both dashed outside laughing about it. She probably didn't think it too funny, but it was amusing especially at 12am. She was fine. Her tray was full of water so I dumped it and put in dry newspaper and Monkey got rubbed down with a dry towel. She looked funny, but she was alive and well this morning and no worse for the wear. Poor bunny. She didn't know that when the child came home, she got moved down the totem pole. It's been a tough 2 years for her!

6 Months Later

So it's been almost six months since Hashimoto became a word in my vocabulary. Well, in truth that word didn't enter until November when I found a GOOD doctore, but nevertheless. I feel less tired than I used to, but it's still a rollercoaster ride. I need to go back to my doctor and get my meds readjusted. I also am going to have them test for Celiac Disease and something else that I can't remember. Celiac Disease is closely related to Hashimotos. I feel like an old lady lately. (Sorry old ladies) I get so stiff and sore when I sit in one position for too long. Especially if I'm sitting on my knees. That isn't normal and from what I've read could be Celiac. BLAH. Not fun. I also have some days where I could clean the whole house followed by days of not wanting to do anything. Again, not good. I need to reserve a day to sitting and waiting and going back to the doctor so that I can get to feeling better again. I've lost my creative side most days and that I hate the most. I just don't feel like sewing or scrapbooking or anything. Too much mess, too much thinking. Gotta get down to the bottom of this so that I can feel better.
Oh and my toes hurt with cold on chilly days. And I'm tired of being cold all the time still!

To Santa or not to Santa

Santa or no Santa is the current debate in our household. I do not wish to perpetuate the fantasy of Santa to our child(ren in the future). I don't see the point. Yes, we all lived through it and amazingly still trusted our parents after the pulled a huge rouse over our heads. I just can't do it. What makes me highly amused this Christmas is looking at the thought of Christmas through non-believers who celebrate it anyhow. Those people with the "holiday" trees and such. If you look at Christmas strictly from that view it is hilarious. They are celebrating a fantasmical man who "breaks" into houses to leave gifts. What is the point???? It's absurdly funny. Celebrating a fat man whose belly is like a bowl full of jelly. Pointless. Yes, you can say that it's the spirit of St. Nick that they are celebrating. Giving to others. That is a good thing, don't get me wrong. But why must we do it under the cloud of some nice guy that lived a long time ago? Why can't do we believers go along with the fat man idea and tell our children that some mystical person cares about them enough to give them presents? Why do we do that? What about the real reason of Christmas? The real person who came down to earth, the real person who gave us the best gift of all. Why don't we give eachother gifts in memory of Jesus coming to earth? Why do we buy into the fantasy fat man?
Maybe it's the magic of being young. But it seems shoddy that we have to lie to our children to give them some magic in their lives. I think the magic in life can come from the amazement of how a tiny acorn becomes a mighty oak tree. That kind of magic will even cause adults to take a second look at the amazment of it.
So my reasoning abolishes the tooth fairy and the Easter bunny from being acceptable facets of the holidays and the like. Not everyone in my household agrees with me mind you. Why did I come to this line of thought? I have two children whom I give cooking lessons to. They were here about two weeks ago and they were going on and on about Santa and how they have seen him here and there and some elf creature that lives in their house who goes to the North Pole every day to report on their behavior, etc. etc. etc. It pained me (really it did) to hear them, ages 10 and 7, go on and on and on about this. I felt awful listening to them and going along with the lie that they believed. I didn't agree with them or encourage them. I didn't say anything except "wow" and the like. I didn't need to because they were so excited.
Maybe I'm being overly analytical about this whole thing. Maybe I should just relax and let my child believe in the fat man. But I don't know why I should. Why should some fat guy he's never met love him more than I and buys him gifts that he'll love get all the thanks? Not that I need praises from my child, but I don't think some nobody should get the credit. I want to focus on the real reason for the season. I want my family's view to be that of Jesus and not a guy in a red suit. Is that so wrong?

Come Lord Jesus

I regularly read a blog and I came across this from an entry on this particular blog and I agreed a lot with the sentiments that she expressed -

Honestly, I am grieved over other things…I am grieved that some Christians are walking around with anxiety, gripped with fear that O is the Antichrist. I am also grieved that other Christians are walking around rejoicing in a man’s ability to save them from all their sorrows, all their pain, their financial woes, and who knows what else. If people were to actually read the Bible they would see that God has always been aware of who is in office and at times, appointed leaders to teach His children lessons. I am grieved that for some, so much emotion is put into a political election that when their candidate wins or loses, some actually think it is the saving answer or the end of the world…So? What if it is? What if it is the end of the world? Why does that thought provoke paralyzing fear in some people, namely people who claim the name of Christ? Either God is on the throne or He’s not…He is who He says He is or He’s not…either He is truth or He isn’t…either He knows what He’s doing, or well, if He doesn’t, we are all screwed, frankly, so none of this really matters…I rest in the peace of knowing that God is good, He is on the throne, and that He loves us too much to allow us to become complacent...He is sifting, therefore, He disciplines those He loves. (noahsteven.blogspot.com)

It is true. It is interesting that people think Obama is going to save us from ourselves. He can try, but he is man. Man cannot save himself or anyone else. And does it really matter about O's position on life? Not really. We're all responsible to God for our decisions. If we support abortion and partial birth abortion murder then we answer to God for what we believe. I wish that people didn't believe that abortion was a good answer to an unwanted pregnancy, but unfortunately it is. But whether or not it's legal or whether or not our president elect is for or against it, he will answer to God just like everyone else. All we can do is to pray for those who feel that way because answering to God for the murder of an innocent human being is going to be quite a scene, one that I never want to be a part of. God knit everyone in their mother's womb from the time of conception onward. He is the one that is going to be angry at anyone who thinks that abortion is a good idea. We don't have to be angry at them. We need to feel sorry for them and pray that they will have a change of heart.

And also to comment on the quote I have above, I agree, so what if it is the end of the world? If you're a Christian, what in life is there to fear? Nothing and no one but God himself. He is the only one that deserves our fear. It is He who controls the storms and the wind and the waves. It is He who provides and gives is what we need. Not man, not a president. No one but God Almighty is to fear. And if the end of the world is coming, all I have to say is "Come Lord Jesus."

Find Your Fun

I had orchestra rehearsal last night. I finally practiced my piece with some determination to master some rather difficult parts with nearly impossible fingerings. I'm tell you, Tchikowski was no flute player. That's besides the point. As I was playing and finally able to play those tricky measures I realized how much fun I have playing. I think when we get to be adults we put behind some of those things that use to give us so much pleasure as children. Who says that you can't still play on a soccer team or still play your musical instrument? There are plenty of outlets in most major cities for people who want to continue something that they enjoyed earlier in life. I think that not finding a fun outlet is another reason why so many people are so glum all of the time. I'm around other mothers quite often and I don't see a lot of sparkle anymore. I sometimes think, do these women really know how to have fun anymore? We get so bogged down by the trials and not so fun stuff that we have to deal with as adults that we forget to have fun once in a while. I love playing my flute in the New Life Symphony Orchestra. Yes I'd love it more if I got paid for it, but that isn't the point of this orchestra. I have fun, it is challenging, and it is something that is unique and different about me because I really don't know a whole lot of adults who still have hobbies that they began when they were only 11 years old. Go find your fun. Join a club, band, team, whatever and stop being so gloomy and feeling sorry for yourself.

Was Jesus a Socialist?

Interesting thing to think about on the heels of yesterday's election. Obama's name is closely associated with the word socialist it seems. You could say that Jesus held socialist ideals. One big idea of socialism is equality and giving to the poor. A sort of Robin Hood idea - steal from the rich to give to the poor. So here are some verses in which someone could make an argument that Jesus would be okay with socialism -

- Galations 3:28 "There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. "

- Luke 12:33 - Sell your possessions and give to the poor. Provide purses for yourselves that will not wear out, a treasure in heaven that will not be exhausted, where no thief comes near and no moth destroys.

- Luke 18:22 - When Jesus heard this, he said to him, "You still lack one thing. Sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me."

I'm sure you could find more, but you get the point. However, even if you could find 100 more verses supporting a socialist thought in the New Testament, you are failing to see the heart behind the matter. Jesus doesn't force anyone to give to the poor. He doesn't make anyone do anything that they don't want to. Jesus gives us the freedom to give to those less fortunate then ourselves. And another thing, though there are many verses that speak to being generous with one's possessions, the focus on Jesus's ministry was on spiritual matters, not material. He also made it quite clear what his true priorities were. For instance, when asked if he had come to abolish the law that was set in the Old Testament, he replied:

"Do not think that I have come to abolish the law or the prophets. I have come not to abolish but to fulfill. Amen, I say to you, until heaven and earth pass away, not the smallest letter or the smallest part of a letter will pass from the law, until all things have taken place. Therefore, whoever breaks one of the least of these commandments and teaches others to do so will be called least in the kingdom of heaven. But whoever obeys and teaches these commandments will be called greatest in the kingdom of heaven" (Matt 5:17-19).

And how about what he wanted us to do with our lives?:

"Go, therefore, and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, until the end of the age" (Mark 28:18-20).

He wanted and wants us still to spread the Gospel, give to the poor because we know it is the right thing to do, not because someone forces you to do so. And another thing, true socialism, since it wants to erase classes and differences would take away your freedom.
As Pope Benedict XVI has written:
"Let us recall the fact that atheism and the denial of the human person, his liberty and his rights, are at the core of the Marxist theory...Moreover, to attempt to integrate into theology an analysis whose criterion of interpretation depends on this atheistic conception is to involve oneself in terrible contradictions. What is more, this misunderstanding of the spiritual nature of the person leads to a total subordination of the person to the collectivity, and thus to the denial of the principles of a social and political life which is in keeping with human dignity."

Hashimoto!

Isn't that fun to say? Hashimoto. Come on, say it out loud, fun, isn't it? I mean, it's great to get diagnosed with something that is actually fun to say. Hashimoto's Thyroiditis. Tons of fun.
I finally found a doctor that I like! Never mind that I was there for THREE HOURS. But, he is into holistic medicine and it makes me happy! He actually believes in propolous for the immune system! Go figure. God made things that can help us feel better? No way! I like God made cures for things. Even my new medication isn't synthetic. Yay! Oh and for more giggles, his first name is Vladamir (like Dracula) and I saw him on Halloween, and they took blood. hahaha.
Basically after I had Knox, my immune system went crazy and as my doctor said, "Your immune system woke up and it was like it got a machine gun and went Boom! Boom! Boom! and it shot your thyroid." Even the way it happened is amusing. This explains why my allergies have been something awful this past year. My immune system is just trying to hold it all together. I'm surprise that I didn't get really sick this year. I think all I've had was a cold or two. Yay for washing hands and eating healthy. So basically it will slowly deteriorate throughout my life. Oh well. It could be worse. Well, potentially it could be. Type One Diabetes and Celiac Disease are related to Hashimotos so hopefully I don't get either one. I haven't figured out which causes which others so maybe I don't have to worry. That's a question I'll need to ask next time I spend the afternoon at the doc's office. But seeing as I can pretty much understand his English despite his Russian/Ukrainian accent, he's into holistic medicine, and he actually TALKED to me, I'm a very happy Hashimoto Thyroiditis individual. It doesn't take much to make me happy these days!

Rebellion and Redemption

This is the chapter theme for chapter one of Isaiah. Reviewing the background of Isaiah would help before proceeding.
In chapter one, God is upset with Israel because they do not understand God. They are revolting against him and he's not too happy with it. The Israelites are offering sacrifices to God like he commanded them to do, but they are not doing it because they want to. For them it's just another ritual. God says that he is weary of bearing the festivals and feasts. The offerings are worthless and the incense that they are burning is an abomination to him. He is thoroughly frustrated with his people. He even says to them in v 15 "So when you spread out your hands in prayer, I will hid My eyes from you; Yes, even though you multiply prayers, I will not listen. You hands are covered with blood."
We can be much like the Israelites. We go to church because we're "supposed to", we may do our quiet time because "everyone else is doing it" and we do many other things that we may just do them because that is what a "good" Christian does. God doesn't want your puppet responses, he wants to you want to worship Him. He wants you to want to read about Him. Does God listen to the prayers of the insincere? We talked about this in Bible study. Some people thought that God hears the prayers of everyone, but perhaps ignores the insincere ones. I don't know the answer. We can read that here God ignores the prayers of the Israelites, but we live in a time after the coming of the Messiah which makes a difference in how some things now work. The bottom line is that God wants sincere hearts when living our faith and our lives.
Even though he is completely upset with his people he still offers forgiveness to them. V 18 "Come now, and let us reason together,' says the Lord, 'Though your sins are as scarlet, they will be as white as son; though they are red like crimson, they will be like wool."
No matter how badly we mess up, God always is there to forgive us and cleanse us. No sin is too great for him to forgive us from. The New Testament tells us many times over that if we believe that we have everlasting life from our belief in Jesus, then we do. Our outcome is determined by ones faith. If we look at what influences us, what/who we turn to in trouble, what/who we turn to in joy, it can show us where our faith lies. God doesn't want you on the fence. He wants you all for him. Jesus came and is kind of like the great divide - either you believe in Him or you don't. There isn't a grey area like we love to have on issues. It is pretty clear cut with God. Either you believe and have everlasting life, or you don't. We all get a chance to believe. More on that in a few more chapters.
Hold on to your hats though, things get worse before they get better. The Israelites are not always the smartest people (hmm.. like us!) and we're going to see how God deals with them and their rebellion and their breaking of the everlasting covenant.

Too Much, Too Little

I haven't abandoned this little project of mine. I have been super busy. Craft fairs, trunk shows in the works, etc. I have a cooking class tomorrow with just one kid :( sigh. I was hoping to make a bit more this weekend than what I will be making.
I need to find time to sit down and write about Isaiah. That book is awesome. Though I dont' recommend just plowing through it. You need to study it. One chapter at a time. Precpt upon precept as they say. lol.
I have to figure out where to begin in all that I want to write about as well. Baby boy has been sick so a lot of my free time has been spent napping with him which makes him sleep for a long time, but limits my freedom. He's so cute. Even when he covers you in boogers.

Silly People

I really don't have time to be doing this with the craft fair less than 48hrs away, but I had to comment on the silly scene I saw tonight. I was just about home when I spotted two middle aged individuals walking their dogs. Not too silly you may say. But hang on. There was one large dog and one tiny dog like a chihuahua. The lady had what at first looked like a baby Bjorn type carrier on but upon closer inspection it was a doggie carrier! I just thought it was silly.

Who Do You Trust?

The economy is quite cruddy lately apparently. I really don't pay much attention to the news. What I do pay attention to is what the Israelites failed to do and I'm trying not to do the same thing. The Israelites looked to man and the works of their own hands. They worshiped idols that they had made. How silly is that? Think about it. They may have taken a stick, carved a neat looking design and face on it and decided it was worship worthy. And then they worshiped it! A stick! Silly, no? But we do the same thing. We "make" things like our houses, our cars, our possessions and then we worship them. Who made those things? Another human being. Even though we may have earned the money to pay for those items, why do we hold them in such esteem? We shouldn't praise man. Isaiah writes that who is man that we should esteem him? His life is in his breath.
In saying this, who should we look to in these times of trouble? The govenment? No way. They are man, and we shouldn't esteem them. Plus the Israelites were constantly looking towards the government to save them and they got captured and lots of not so happy things happened to them. We need to look towards God to sustain us through these hard times. God is the only one who will carry us through without fail. If he cares for the lilies and the birds, shouldn't he care even more for us? We are made in his image. He cares deeply for us and wants to provide for us in only the way that he can. For some, that providing may be just having enough to get by on for others it may be a more prosporous existence. If you look to God to provide the means to take care of your family, he will do so. You may not get enough to buy that new expensive item that you want, but he will provide you with enough to pay the bills, feed your family and keep a roof over your head.

Longing

I spent some time at Providence today taking photos for the yearbook. I love being attached to that place still. Love seeing my former students grow up, love chatting with *most* of the parents, love seeing old co-workers who were more friends than co-workers. The bad part is that it stirs up a longing. What made it harder today than usual is I was by myself, not chasing after Knox, and I had orchestra afterwards. It was reminiscent of past Thursdays. I would teach all day, go to La Madeline's or Corner Bakery, get dinner, grade papers or read and then walk back over to PCBC where my car was parked to go to orchestra. Tonight I went to Providence, saw people, took pics, parked my car by PCBC, walked to Corner Bakery, got some soup, sat on a bench outside because it was so nice out, ate my dinner, read Dallas Child, and then went to orchestra.
I love staying at home, don't get me wrong, but part of me will long for teaching again. Sometimes I wish I could do both. That I could teach and stay home at the same time. Don't ask me how that would work! I was supposed to coach volleyball this fall for Covenant. I was so looking foward to it because it was going to pacify that longing for teaching that I've had to put on the shelf. It fell through at the last moment. I'm hoping maybe basketball will be an option instead now. Keeping my fingers crossed about that one. I know that I can teach Knox, and I do, but when you're used to teaching deep concepts about chemisty and physics, building a block tower doesn't always have the same appeal.
I know that in my current state teaching would wear me out completely anyhow, so it is good that I'm at home since my thyroid hates me and makes me feel some days like it's never going to be good again. I know it'll get better, but there are periods in my day where I feel pretty cruddy.
Oh well. Such is life. Maybe that is why I stay so busy so that I don't have to pay attention to the part of me that misses teaching science to all those children. Some day. But the thing is, some day won't be the same. Even if I got my old position back, the co-workers would be different. My old students would be gone. It would be different. Then maybe I'd not like it and be unhappy and long for the days of staying at home.
It seems in life we're always longing for something or missing something. It's hard sometimes to be content with what you have and be satisfied with your current lot in life.
I am happy with life, just sometimes I miss things that aren't possible anymore.

Do You Fear God or Man?

I have been a participant in a Precept Bible Study on Isaiah. If you ever get a chance to do one, DO IT. Studying the Bible intensly has made me learn so much about God. I thought I knew a decent amount, but I didn't! I still don't, but I'm learning.
The main idea that I'm getting out of my study is that we must fear God, not man. Why? Well here's one favorite verse to tell you why to not fear man- "Stop regarding man, whose breath of life is in his nostrils; For why should he be esteemed?" Isa. 2:22

Before I launch into a blog series about Isaiah, I'm going to give some background. I was a bit confused when I started, so I imagine other people may be as well.

Israel consisted of 12 tribes. They spilt into two kingdoms. The S. Kingdom contained the tribes of Benjamin and Judah. The N. Kingdom the other ten. Some members of the N. tribes decided to stay behind because the S. Kingdome contained Jerusalem (where the temple was).

The N. Kingdom is called Israel and Ephraim
The S. Kingdom is typically called Judah in Isaiah

Isaiah is speaking from 739BC until 681BC. In 722BC Judah gets captured by Assyria, but it isn't complete for 180yrs.

There were four kings during Isaiah's time: Uzziah, Jotham, Ahaz and Hezekiah

Got that?

Quick summary - Judah has turned its back on God and he isn't too happy with them. However, because God is who he is, he is always willing to forgive if they would just turn towards him. Sound familiar?

Isaiah is a scary book because you can see so many parallels to today! I think that is enough for today. Don't want to overload anyone.

I hate cleaning my hairbrush

I really do have more intelligent things to say than I'm tired, but that is about all I can come up with at the moment. Lately I've been stopping and thinking, was I better off not knowing why I was so tired all of the time and why my hair was falling out? No, in the long run it's better that I know, but in the short run, it's so annoying. I really hate it all. I was on 100mcg and now 88mcg and honestly, I don't notice any difference! I probably could have napped 3xs today. I settled for only 2. I just need to go to bed. But the problem is, when it's bed time, I can't fall asleep. That would lead one to believe that I was still on too much.
I need a new doctor.
I have two I want to call, I just forget to call. One supposedly is holistic. Doctors are too one sided. They just want to "fix" the problem, but their fixing sometimes is a bandaid. I want a cure. Not a bandaid.
I have many posts floating in my head, but when I sit down, I'm too tired to think about it.
I will soon blog about Isaiah and Israel and how freaky it is that the pages of Isaiah is almost like holding up a mirror to the world's present state. But here is a preview -
The LORD is with you when you are with him. If you seek him, he will be found by you, but if you forsake him, he will forsake you. 2 Chron. 15:2

Sick People AKA Why we need God

I hardly pay attention to the news. I should continue not to. People are sick and demented. A lady, from where I don't remember, was recently convicted for MICROWAVING her child. Yes, you read that right. I had to re-read the article myself. SICK SICK SICK. It said she was fighting with her boyfriend over the child or something to that extent.
This and a conversation I had at some point in life with a friend over their many significant others whether relationships or random dating has made me think about how much we really do need God to be the center of our lives. How unhappy and sick was that mother that killed her child because of her need to be with her boyfriend and was willing to get rid of her own flesh and blood to do so. You could subsitute boyfriend with money, power, anything almost. If we're not placing God at the center, than bad things happen.
We really do not need other human beings to make us happy. We need God to make us "happy" and the rest will fall into place. I'm not saying that if you're a Christian you will be loved by everyone, but I believe that if we follow God and place him in the center of our lives, he will lead us to a place where we will have support from other Christians. No one, no thing can ever fill that void. I look at celebrities and see all the crud they do and I do think, boy do they have a Jesus shaped hole in their hearts. It's true! Yes, that sounds Sunday school-ish, but it is true. Why do you think that God wrote that we were to have no other gods before Him? It is because he is the only one that can fill that Jesus shaped hole. I look at Britney Spears when she is on the tv and the media is tearing her apart and I feel sooooo sorry for her. She is such a mess. She needs someone to come into her life and help her turn her life to God. I have friends in my own life who need to stop filling the emptiness with things other than God. It is hard to tell people that they have a Jesus shaped hole in their hearts sometimes, but it is TRUE.
Why do we place other things before God? Well, for one, we're big sinners. And living in a sinful world just helps us keep going with that sinfulness in our own lives. It is so much easier to place things in front of God (so we think) than to stop, pray and read about God. Sinning can be fun. It is hard to be good. I watch my son do naughty things like touching the trash can or other things he isn't supposed to do and he enjoys doing those things. (Gross, yes).
I'm kinda loosing my train of thought, but it all comes down to the fact that we need to be Christ centered in our lives. Only Christ can fill us. Only Christ can make us happy. Only Christ can make us feel like a real person. Only Christ can make us clean in a dirty world. Only Christ can save us. I could go on. You get the point.

The Word is NO!

(Knox and his cousin, Mathis, playing together yesterday)
We are getting deeper into the jungle known as TODDLERHOOD! All the parenting articles and books say that you shouldn't say "no" all the time, but instead say "we don't do that" or "that's not a good idea." But when you're child is going after the electical sockets for the millionth time, creativity ends and the NOs! begin. Knox is definately getting a little personality of his own that thinks for himself. His little tantrums right now are quite hilarious. He yells and stomps his feet while standing in place. It's quite amusing. He has wound up on the floor occasionally in a real fit of passion, but thankfully, they are short lived.

On the other hand, having a toddler is tons of fun. He mimicks talking on a cell phone with our cell phones, the tv remote, his baby moniter, and most recently a calculator. He presses buttons and then jabbers and laughs with the object up to his ear. It's quite amusing. Thankfully he's only managed to call Darren the few times I accidently forgot to lock the buttons on my phone. That is the handiest invention ever. I put it on ring, lock the buttons and let him play.

He's one of the most amusing people I know.